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“How do you cope with all of this?” Jenna asked.

“I drink.”

“No, seriously, what do you do to relieve the stress?”

“Seriously, I drink. Or you could say I seriously drink.”

Monica was kidding, of course, but only to a point. Working with children who have autism all day, every day was incredibly stressful. She enjoyed her work, but it was often very frustrating and it had a very low reward-to-time spent ratio because it often took a really long time to make any kind of progress. It was the kind of work that would bring most people to their knees in short order.

To her knees. Monica hadn’t been on hers in so long she couldn’t remember the last time. She was 32 and in great shape, but her husband didn’t seem to care she still worked out nearly every day to stay fit and toned. Like her sister-in-law and best friend, Jenna, she got to the gym before work five day a week and also went during the afternoon on Saturday. She and their husbands, twin brothers Michael and David Thomas, had a standing dinner date every Sunday which alternated between homes every other week.

“How do you deal with it, Jenna?” Monica asked her.

Jenna was a probation officer who dealt with rapists, murderers, child molesters, and what most would call the dregs of society. Like Monica, she was a hopeless progressive who was endlessly patient and ever-hopeful that her efforts might help make society better. Were she honest, she’d have to admit any progress she made was very small as most criminals tended to be recidivists who ended up back in jail before completing probation. But Jenna Thomas didn’t give up. Not at work and not at home. Were she a quitter, she’d be ready to throw in the towel on her marriage of five years to David who no longer seemed to know or even care she was alive.

“I masturbate. A lot.”

“Jenna! For goodness sake. What is wrong with you?”

“Nothing. I’m just a neglected housewife. Masturbation is perfectly normal. You should try it sometime.”

“Okay, you’re not getting any attention at home either, but do you always have to be so…direct?” She loved Jenna. They’d been best friends since she’d married Michael’s twin brother, David, a year after she and Michael had themselves wed. Being twins, the brothers were inseparable so what little free time Michael had, he wanted to spend with David. Monica understood that, but the understanding did nothing to alleviate the frustration and sexual tension which regularly built up inside her to the boiling point.

Jenna was by far the more confident and outspoken of the two, but even her tendency to say what was on her mind hadn’t yielded any appreciable results on the home front. Neither she nor Monica were getting kind the love, attention, and yes—sex—they’d both gotten very used to the first years of their marriages.

As far as her outspokenness was concerned, Monica often found it annoying, but she loved Jenna dearly. She sometimes just wished she could tone it down a bit. All in all, Jenna and Monica loved one another like sisters and sometimes they fought like they were. Over the years, they had become as close as any two friends could. They’d hit it off immediately, but it took time for them to learn to trust one another with any and all secrets. They now shared things with each other they knew with certainty would never be repeated, not even to the other’s husband.

“Maybe I should start diddling myself, too,” Monica admitted wistfully. “Lord knows it’d be better than what I’m getting from Mike.”

“I take it things are no better around here than the last time we had this discussion?” Jenna asked.

“No, not really. Just the same old thing. Or lack thereof I should say,” she told Jenna truthfully. “Seriously, how do you cope with the stress?” Monica asked because in addition to their stressful jobs, they both had mortgages, car payments, student loans, and the outrageous property taxes assessed in ultra-liberal Berkeley, California.

Both of the brothers were worked for the city. Together, each couple made a little over eighty thousand a year, but that was more than gobbled up by monthly expenses and the occasional vacation. All four of the Thomases wanted children, but neither couple even thought about having them because of the added financial stress. So between that and their work, the added frustration of not getting laid was driving both of them crazy.

Jenna sighed and said, “Honestly? I fantasize—a lot.”

“Fantasy. So…how’s that working for you?” Monica asked with just a slight touch of snarkiness. She wasn’t trying to be mean, she just wanted to know if that (or anything) actually helped. She genuinely wanted to know if it brought relief to Jenna, because it didn’t do much for her. Monica thought of fantasizing as being little more than mental masturbation. It might make you temporarily feel better, but it didn’t solve anything. As the more practical of the two, Monica was always looking for actual solutions to the problem while Jenna needed to talk—and vent. Sometimes however, Jenna took ataköy escort action and what she did often surprised or even shocked her sister-in-law. This was one of those times.

Jenna didn’t answer right away. She sat there and waited for Monica to look at her. “What?” Monica said when she finally turned Jenna’s way. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I just wanted to make sure I have your attention,” her best friend told her. “Now that I do, I’m going to share something with you which is obviously off-limits to the guys. I um, well, I created a dating profile on line.”

“You what?” Monica said, her voice rising with incredulity.

“Hear me out! I’m not actually dating anyone. I just decided to put up a profile with some pics and see what happens.”

“But you have to be single to do that. What if someone finds out? What if they try and find out who you are and learn you’re married and playing with them? That might not end well, Jenn.”

“Well…it’s a site for um…married people. So there’s no issue with telling the truth because I am married.”

“Jesus, Jenna.” Monica finished putting the dishes away then said down and said excitedly, “Okay, you have my full attention now. So…have you had any…interesting responses?”

Jenna flashed a wicked smile. “Oh, yeah. A lot of them.”

Monica put the last of the silverware in the drawer then sat down at the table and said, “Okay, tell me everything!”

Jenna told her she’d had replies from every kind of guy imaginable. Fat, bald, old, rich, poor, young, handsome, and even gorgeous. Many were single looking to hook up with MILFs, but most were also married and looking for a little fun on the side.

“What’s a MILF?” Monica asked.

Jenna laughed. It stands for “Mothers I’d Love to Fuck.”

Monica’s eyes opened wide. “You’re kidding? Hot young guys want to hook up with older, married women?”

Jenna slightly lowered her head and raised an eyebrow. “Are you kidding? MILFs hooking up with cubs—the name for younger guys—is all the rage. You can’t possibly tell me you didn’t know that.” Jenna watched Monica’s reaction then said, “On the other hand, I can see how being up to your eyeballs in kids all day long might make it hard to follow the latest social trends but, sheesh… Just trust me when I say it’s a very big deal out there in the real world. Young guys with unending sexual desire and stamina want sex—and nothing else—from attractive older women. Older, attractive, married women.”

Jenna stayed in excellent shape, too, as she and Monica met at the gym closest to their homes every morning and on Saturdays when both could get free. “So…when you um…talk with these hot young guys, these…cubs…are you hooking up with them?”

“Oh, hell no!” she said. “I’d never cheat on David. Okay, I do flirt with a couple of them, but that’s as far as it goes. I’ve even IM’d with a few of the cuter guys, but I’d never give out my phone number or real name. Like I said, it’s just fantasy. A fantasy I use when I masturbate. Which I do…a lot…these days.”

Monica was actually relieved and yet somehow a little disappointed. At some level, she almost wanted her friend to be having some fun, although the rest of her knew it would devastate her marriage and almost certainly end their friendship. But she was just so damn lonely and…horny…all the time lately. It was obvious Jenna was feeling the same way.

They talked for a while longer before Jenna announced she had to get going. As usual, they’d talked a lot but solved nothing. As Jenna got ready to leave they hugged one another goodbye. On the way out to her car, Jenna turned and said, “Don’t forget our appointment this afternoon at the lawyer’s office.”

“Oh, right. No, I won’t forget. We’ve got to get our wills redone. Or file for divorce, right?” Jenna laughed. Monica waved goodbye and said, “I’ll see you there.”

When they all sat down at Hoffman, Brennen, and Rathburn, the firm both couples used, their attorney had the paperwork ready to go. David began by saying, “Okay, we’ve all talked about having kids, but so far, none of us has managed to make that happen. Even so, we all agree we want the other couple to care for them whenever they do come along.”

“Well, yeah. I mean my parents are divorced and on/off drugs all the time so they can’t do it,” Monica said.

“Don’t look at me. We all know the situation with my dad. They don’t let men in prison care for orphans. Besides, is there anyone else on earth we trust more than each other?” Jenna asked. Her dad was one reason she’d gone into working with ex-cons.

“Nope,” Michael chimed in. “It’s obvious my brother and I are extremely close, but both of us love and respect the other’s wife, as well. We’re all family here and we don’t want anyone else raising our future kids.” Both of the girls shot him one of those ‘then why don’t you have them with us’ kind of looks making him feel he needed to add, “You know, when we finally do have them.”

“Same here,” David added.

The attorney bakırköy escort summed it up then told them, “Okay, so all we need to do is have Michelle come in and witness the signing and these will be legal and binding.”

After each had signed the appropriate documents Monica said, “Don’t forget about dinner on Friday this week instead of Sunday.” Everyone nodded and agreed what they’d bring with them.

Dinner at their house—again. How long had it been since she and Michael had had dinner alone? The thought made her cringe. It had been as long as the last time they’d had sex. Over a month. Monica understood married people, even without children, didn’t have sex every night, but this was getting ridiculous. She’d settle for once a week although three times would be ideal. Hell, they used to do it that often or more all the time. It was just this last year when things had slowed down then nearly ground to a painful halt. Michael was feeling the same stress she was with finances and his job and they had been married several years so…maybe it wasn’t all that unusual. Maybe this is just how things tended to go in most marriages. Even if that were the case in most marriages, it wasn’t okay in hers. The thought of living like this the rest of her life was too much to even contemplate. She dreaded having yet another one of those sex talks with Michael, but if she didn’t, she was going to lose it. She quiet literally felt like she was starting to come apart at the seams.


Michael was preparing for a public meeting with the elected city commissioners when he received a text from David: “Don’t forget. Dinner. Tonight. Our place. 7pm. Bring a bottle of that pinot we all liked.”

He was punching in his reply when he got another text. This one was from Monica: “Hi honey. Just a reminder. We have dinner with D&J tonight. Luv U!”

He hit ‘send’ to reply to his brother and ignored the text from his wife. His frustration with her was reaching a new level. She kept hounding him for sex. Every few weeks she’d lay into him with one her patented sex talks. She wasn’t even happy with what sex they were having, and that only made him even less interested. He thought things were pretty good. They’d kiss a little, he’d feel her up, then take care of business. Sure, it was mostly in the missionary position, but what difference did that make? She was always asking him to do her doggy style, and occasionally he’d give in. Lately, he just didn’t have any interest regardless of the angle of the dangle at insertion.

David said things were about the same at his house. Like his twin, he thought things were fine, but Jenna just kept asking to try all kinds of new things while David was content with a little foreplay, intercourse, and falling asleep. Both of them had talked about seeing a marriage counsellor. Of course, they’d also joked about just hooking up with one of the many attractive, single, younger paralegals or secretaries who worked in their respective city government buildings, but that was just talk. Both of them were still head-over-heels in love with their wives, and that just made things seem that much worse. Something had to change.

“Do you have the wine?” Monica asked as they got ready to leave.

Michael tried not to flinch at the unnecessary, umpteenth reminder. He took a deep breath and said, “Yes, I have the wine.” Monica’s tendency to harp on things drove him crazy. She seemed unable to trust him to do anything and this penchant of following up on everything really pushed his buttons.

After dinner, they were all sitting around having a second glass of wine when an oblique reference to sex in a legal case with a one of the city commissioners caused Jenna to pipe up. “Oh, hey. You’ll never guess what I saw on-line the other day.”

Monica almost spewed her wine as she thought to herself, “Oh, please God. Don’t say a word about your profile or MILFs or…”

Michael took a sip and said, “Do tell, Jenn. What is it you found this time?” David laughed as Jenna was famous for finding the most ridiculous, unneeded things on-line. The fact that they weren’t needed never stopped her from buying them and the fact that most of their attic was filled with the unused junk served as a stark reminder. He thought about bringing up the self-basting turkey pan, but decided to let it go.

“No! This isn’t like that. This might be…fun. Tell me what you think and don’t laugh, okay?”

“You’re gonna have to tell us what it is before we can promise you that, hon,” David quipped. “I mean, do I have to remind everyone about the last great thing you found on-line?”

Uh, oh. Here it comes. A turkey baster joke.

Michael roared and even Monica couldn’t help but laugh when David started gobbling like a turkey and bobbing his head up and down. But it wasn’t just the last purchase, it was the sum total of all that—crap—she’d bought and kept on buying.

“Laugh all you want, but I think this would be great.” Everyone settled down and all eyes were on Jenna. She really was very pretty. Several people had commented that she looked a lot like the actress, Monica Potter from the TV series Parenthood. She was blonde, had a great body, nice boobs, and a beautiful face. Monica had absent-mindedly joked once that if she ever switched teams, she’d be hitting on Jenna. The first and last time she said that out loud, Jenna had said, “Well, if you ever do switch teams, let me know immediately, okay?” Monica had felt her face turn red which only fueled the fire for more commentary from Jenna. “Ohhh! I think I just discovered someone’s secret fantasy!” she’d teased. Monica pushed that awful conversation out of her mind along with the strange way it had made her feel.

Jenna waited for everyone to get quiet. “Okay. I found this game that I think all of us could use to you know, kind of get everyone back in the mood.”

David was the first to moan and he did so loudly. “Oh, jeez. You gotta be kidding me?” Michael just smiled as his brother tried to fend of this latest idea. “You want us to play some sex game? You can’t be serious. This is my brother and his wife we’re talking about for Christ’s sake. Come on, honey. Get real.”

“Get real? Okay, I’ll get real. Do you know how many times we’ve had sex in the last six months, David?” He started to speak, but she held up her hand and said, “Oh, no. It’s your turn to listen.” She spread out the fingers on that one hand and said, “Five. Count ’em.” She ticked off each finger as she did, “One, two, three, four…FIVE!” David tried to get a word in edgewise, but Jenna kept right on going. “I’ve burned up two vibrators this year and a third is on the blink. David, something’s gotta give around here. And by something, I mean some ONE. And by some ONE I mean YOU! You need to start giving…it…to me.” Everyone was used to Jenna’s opinionated and um…open style but even David was a little taken aback by this rant. She looked at Monica who was silently trying to gesture something like, “Don’t you dare say a word!” but that didn’t stop the Jenna Express. “And from what I hear, Michael, things aren’t much better at the other Thomas house.”

“Jesus, Michael. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s gotten into her lately. Maybe it’s this wine,” David said apologetically.

Jenna sat up and said, “I can sure as hell tell you what hasn’t gotten into me lately. Do you need me to spell that out for everyone, David?”

Michael noticed Monica was about to die of embarrassment. He grabbed her hand and said, “Honey? Didn’t you say we had to get home early tonight?”

“Um, yes. We have that…you know…thing tomorrow morning so we can’t be out too late.”

“Thing? You can’t be serious! I mean, this is serious and all of us are suffering. And as far as getting home early, it’s only 9 o’clock for God’s sake!” Jenna said. “Come on. You two are having the same problems we’re having. We all love each other. We share stuff and we all know it. So stop pretending like this is some big state secret or something. We want our husbands back and by that I mean…”

“Okay, honey. We get exactly what you mean. No need to get into the details,” David said.

“So will you at least agree to try the game? Come on! You made it sound like you might be interested if it didn’t involve your brother and sister-in-law. I’m saying who better to try this out with than them? Who do we trust more or feel more comfortable around than Michael and Monica?” The question was rhetorical.

Jenna smiled at Monica who still had that mortified look on her face. Sensing her best friend’s discomfort she said, “No! It isn’t like that, hon. You just ask each other questions and get, you know…ideas and stuff. No one has to get naked or actually do anything but then again, that could be a lot of fun.”

“Well, if it doesn’t involve doing anything like strip poker or spin the bottle, maybe it could help. But it’s also up to the guys, you know,” Monica said hoping one of them would bail them all out. She looked at Michael who looked at David who looked at Jenna.

“No nudity, right?” he asked her.

“No. Well, nudity is completely optional but otherwise it’s just questions and ideas,” she assured him.

Michael was still holding Monica’s hand. He squeezed it a little tighter and said, “I gotta tell you that just talking about this has um…given me some ideas.”

Monica pretended to be embarrassed but she felt a warmth spreading through her body that began between her legs. “Mi-chael! For heaven’s sake!” she said loudly. Secretly, she was thrilled.

Jenna took David’s hand and said, “I’ve also got a few ideas of my own as soon as these two go home and start working on theirs.”

“See? Just talking about it helped!” Jenna announced proudly. “So let’s give it a try. Lord knows things could use some spicing up around here. If it helps, great. If not, then…” Everyone knew what ‘then’ meant but no one wanted to talk about it. All of them were young, healthy, attractive people, and yet they weren’t having sex. That couldn’t go on because there were too many good-looking cubs and secretaries running around looking for people their age and if they couldn’t get it at home, they would eventually get it somewhere with someone—else.

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